Yesterday CSULB officials met in a closed session to discuss the fate of the Pyramid. Citing financial reasons and cultural indifference, they unanimously voted to replace the pyramid with the much-anticipated rec center.
Original blueprints for the rec center were revised following a series of student complaints regarding lack of parking. According to an inside source, rather than approaching the parking situation head-on, school officials opted to bribe students with a flashier gold-plated rec center.
To further boost school spirit, the rec center will be modeled after a Goldmine theme. Mine shafts will replace hallways and lockers rooms will resemble covered wagons. A 50-foot model of Prospector Pete will stand triumphantly at the entrance greeting students and visitors. Engineers are currently developing a way for the model to swing a pick-axe from side to side. The statue can be seen from the intersection of Palo Verde and Atherton.
"This is as much of a surprise for us as it is for everyone when we were asked to start building the rec center so early," Said Javier Santiago Jesus Mendoza Gutierrez Soto Arroyo Pollo Arroz Enchilada Smith, one of the engineers on the rec center team. "What's even more surprising is the 50-foot monolith that we were ordered to build as well."
Possible plans for the pyramid were discussed at the meeting to include integrating with the new rec center. Other options include auxiliary parking and a new dorm complex. One official suggested turning the pyramid into a cube, which he claimed would be more aesthetically pleasing.
Students have met this change of plans with mixed emotions.
"We're already a joke in the CSU system," Said Rebecca Walters, an Anglo-studies major. "Mine shafts will not make it any better."
"I would much rather have a blue cube than a pyramid any day," Said Daniel Murphison, an architect major. "I would decorate it with glue and macaroni."
Although opinions have varied on the project, construction will commence at the end of the school year. As a result, next semester's fees are expected to rise another 30 percent.
4 comments:
That sucks. I'm all for a rec center, but the pyramid is our school's landmark!
This is a perfect example of what a blog can accomplish. Well done.
Nooooo! Not the Pyramid
I, personally, do not think that they should change the pyramid. It is part of the top ten things to see in southern California and not only that it is one of the tallest buildings or land structures. (can't quite remember)
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